We met last year on WordPress.
I cannot recall which one of us read the other’s work first, or who was the first to comment and start chatting. I do remember thinking she was an incredibly talented writer, and feeling slightly in awe of her.
Once we started talking, we discovered striking similarities in our lives and personalities. Early on, she shared with me her love of food by telling me she had some leftovers in the fridge, which she was inordinately and disproportionately excited about eating later that day; I completely understood where she was coming from. Simpatico!
Since we began talking I do believe not a day has gone past that we haven’t exchanged Skype messages, DMs or emails. I call her my soul sister and, put simply, I am completely in-friend-love with her!
Standing just shy of 6 feet tall in her bare feet, a thick mop of curls framing her very pretty face, (she has no idea how gorgeous she is, which saddens me), a voice sweet as honey, high and lilting with her delicious Southern drawl, we often joke what a funny looking pair we would make. With me just scraping in at 5 feet short, she joked one time that we would look like Annie Potts standing next to Ru Paul, from which a typically silly conversation about big black cocks ensued. Don’t ask…
Incredibly funny and quick-witted, with a lexicon any sailor would be proud of, she makes me howl with laugher every day. We talk about anything and everything, effortlessly switching between serious life issues to mundane houswifey exchanges about cooking to hilariously surreal comedy sketches.
Her tale of her very aggressive angry cock, (FYI: she keeps chickens and had… note the past tense… a cockerel) one day made me almost wet myself and had a similar effect on the OH when I shared it with him. I awoke one morning to the text, “Angry cock is dead”, and felt compelled to screencap it and tweet it along with the words, “who else is lucky enough to wake up to such a message from their bestie?” It seemed the previous evening “angry cock” attacked her for the last time and paid the ultimate price. This is one lady you do not mess with!
Multitalented to the point that, if I didn’t love her, I’d hate her, she impresses me frequently with her array of skills. Her portfolio includes; drawing, writing, singing, (she’s an alto), piano playing, carpentry, butter and cheese-making, cooking, baking, sowing, knitting, animal husbandry, shooting, horse training and horse riding, she even acted as midwife to a sheep once, or was it a pig?
There are bound to be more things I will discover about her as our friendship continues. I’m pretty sure she could hotwire a car, and of course, we know she can kill a cockerel bare-handed, “process” him, (euphemism for plucking and gutting) and happily enjoy him for dinner.
I remember being as nervous about our first Skype call as I would have been for a first date… what if she didn’t like me? what if we ran out of things to talk about? what if she thinks I’m boring? Three hours later, exhausted from laughing and talking, we ended the call with promises to do it again, and we have, several times, but not enough in my opinion.
I love so many things about her; her accent and turns of phrase make me smile, (“Oh my lord!” in her Scarlett O’Hara-esque pitch), her snorts of laughter, her passionate rants about government, men, stupid people, her habit of constant throat-clearing and gazing wistfully off into the distance as she thinks about what she wants to say, and stories about her Mom, (who incidentally, sounds as eccentric and endearingly loony as she is!).
I’ve met her dog, cat, (who is, weirdly, called my name!), and horse and I have been introduced to her chickens! She has met the OH and my two dogs.
We have shared photos from our younger days, stories about our lives and families, we have swapped our most embarrassing stories, (which she made me swear I would never even tell to the OH… oh god it is such a good story!)
I truly hope that we will continue to be friends for life. She has added to my life in so many ways. I am constantly threatening to hop on a plane and visit her and she has promised if she ever wins the lottery she will move to Ireland and we can get into all sorts of trouble together. I’ve promised if I win it I’m flying over, picking her up and we head to the best suite in the best hotel in NYC for a couple of weeks of hedonism and mischief… the details of which are way too scandalous to print here.
If any of you reading this know her and know me… well, I think you can imagine the debauchery!
I realise now that, rather than write a character study as was my brief, I have penned a love letter to my best friend, and that is fine with me! Life is short and I am a firm believer in taking every opportunity to tell the people you love how much they mean to you.
Feli… I love ya sis!
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