5 thoughts on “Love Yourself Challenge #18

  1. I didn’t want to forgive my grandfather for having raped me, but I had to. Not because he deserved forgiveness (he was long-dead when I forgave him) but because forgiving him helped me move forward with MY OWN LIFE in a healthy manner. I didn’t want to forgive myself for having allowed my grandfather to rape me, even though I was ten years old at the time…for years I thought it was somehow my fault & I hated myself for it, and, OK, the mental health professional had to help me with that one, but eventually I forgave myself, I came to understand it was never my fault.

    You don’t always forgive someone because they deserve it. You forgive them because you need, you DESERVE to move forward with your life without that baggage dragging you back.

    • I do understand that Cara and maybe one day I’ll get there. I am so sorry to hear about happened to you and I think you are pretty amazing to have forgiven him, but more importantly, yourself and realised it was never your fault. It was all his.

  2. What Cara said.
    I have a similar approach with the ex. Granted, he keeps throwing stuff at me that makes it challenging, but… I am aiming for it. I don’t harbour hatred for him in my heart. Not any more. I think at least 😉
    I do hate some of the things he does, but it’s not him I hate. It helps me being more at peace every day.
    Forgiving myself for having stayed for so long with this guy… it was tough. Now I have a new reason not to regret anything. If I’d left sooner, I’d probably never have met some of my very good friends, and I certainly wouldn’t have met The Dancer. And THAT would have been a real pity! 🙂

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