Jealousy


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Today Lynn nudged us with the word “Jealousy“.

I’m not on form today, I think!

 


seeing you with him

      touching him

                   kissing him

drives me insane

      you were mine

before you were my

       brother’s wife


“I’m not jealous! She’s welcome to him…” croaked through hot tears as she opened the second bottle…


💋

Copyright, 2016, k1kat.com

All rights reserved.

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Obsession


Today Lynn gave us the nudge “Obsession“.

When I think of obsession, in regard to love or romance, I am drawn to the dark side, (but then again, I live quite a fair share of my life on the dark side, so no surprises there!)

I had fun with this edit though; I wanted to really capture and portray the compulsive, manic nature of obsession. In doing so, I might have stretched Lynn’s rules… sorry Lynn!

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I had a second edit which I really like too; a softer version, but I hope it still has a slightly sinister feeling of a woman being watched and perhaps hunted…

(And yes… you can see where I bite my lip in the photo!)

 

 

 

 

Looking forward to our next nudge!

Ciao!

💋

Copyright, 2016, k1kat.com

All rights reserved.

Word for Wednesday (W4W) #20


Wow! Up to the 20th W4W already!  Play along here!

This week’s word is…

Figging

The, (in my humble opinion), woefully untalented E.L. James has released her “new” novel Grey due to “popular demand”…

First of all… really????? Popular demand? People actually requested this? Any hope I have for the future of civilisation is seriously challenged by the idea that people wanted to read more of her cliché-ridden, misinformed and badly researched drivel.

Secondly, I put new in parentheses because this simply is not a new novel. It is a lazy, copy and paste job with some mind-numbing extra material which is meant to portray the inner world of the very wooden billionaire, Christian Grey, who actually comes across as the dullest goddamned sociopath ever… like ever!

Lastly, I have been delighted with some of the reactions people have had towards the book, and to one scene in particular.

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This, my lovely readers, is what is called figging: the BDSM practice of inserting a piece of peeled ginger root into either the anus or vagina in order for the essential oils to cause a burning/stinging sensation that some people find highly arousing. It can also be used as a punishment technique.

People unfamiliar with the term seemed very freaked out by the idea, and the internet exploded with their reactions…

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I read these reactions and laughed out loud!

It just tickled me that people were so shocked. I guess they are not famialr with Ugol’s Law either:a law first stated by Harry Ugol in the Usenet newsgroup alt.sex.bondage which holds that if there’s some kink you have or something turns you on, no matter how strange or bizarre it may be, you’re not the only one who has that kink. Commentary: I receive a great deal of email from these pages; much of it along the lines of “I didn’t realize other people had the same fantasies and ideas that I do!” The nice thing about living in a world of six billion people is that, no matter how weird or bizarre your turn-ons may be, yes, there are other people like you.”*

One thing I LOVE about people is that no matter how weird you may think you are, you are never the only one to feel like that. I love that, no matter what freaky thing your mind can imagine, no matter how “out there” it is, there is someone else that has thought the same thing at one time or another. This is strangely reassuring to know that I think.

So, if you have ever looked at a piece of ginger and wondered what it would feel like to peel it and pop it up your ass, fear not! you are not the only one. Whatever turns you on, whatever floats your boat, gets your rocks off, tickles your fancy, as long as it is not damaging or harming anyone else why feel bad about it? Life is short… live it however you want to.

And, in case you are wondering… nope! I have never and have no desire or intention to try figging out at all. The only way I want my ginger is in cake or cookie form thank you very much!

Ciao!

💋

*https://www.xeromag.com/fvbdglossary.html

Copyright, 2015, k1kat.com
All rights reserved.

25 Songs, 25 Days (Day 21)


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That is impossible!

I have different songs for different moods. I would find it absolutely impossible to choose one song over another.

But I gotta play by the rules I guess so, with enormous reluctance, I will pick a song…

Jeff Buckley – Hallelujah (1994)

Originally written by Canadian singer-songwriter Leonard Cohen, released in 1984, you can Google endlessly the various interpretations of the meaning of the song, (here for example), but for me, Buckley’s version is all about sex!

Cohen grouchily groaned his way through the song, his rendition void of the raw emotion and passion that Buckley brought to the table.

Buckley’s version, with its melancholy tone, its weeping guitar riffs, his tortured voice and breathing portrays the pain, suffering and vulnerability of love, and was described by Buckley  himself as “a hallelujah to the orgasm”.

In 2004, Time magazine declared that Buckley’s version “exquisitely sung,” adding “Cohen murmured the original like a dirge, but … Buckley treated the … song like a tiny capsule of humanity, using his voice to careen between glory and sadness, beauty and pain… It’s one of the great songs.” I am 100% in agreement with Time on this!

I listen to this song and I get shivers, tingles and yes… I get aroused! It’s my ‘go-to’ sex song to get me in the mood.

Perhaps that is why, if forced to choose a favourite song, I opted for this one… because it gives me those pleasurable feelings…

I am a woman with a very healthy sexual appetite after all, in case you might have missed that somehow, or you haven’t been paying attention!

Let’s add into the mix that he was quite a beautiful looking young man and its safe to say this is one song that will always turn me on.

Ciao!

💋

Copyright, 2015, k1kat.com
All rights reserved.

It’s Not All About Sex…


I posted what I hope is an interesting piece outlining my developing views on BDSM and what it means to me on my other blog, illicitthoughts. I think that it is worth sharing here, as you guys and gals accompany me on my little journey through life!

So… if you didn’t catch it first time around, here we go again!


love receiving feedback and comments on all three of my blogs.

It makes my day that someone has, not only taken the time to read my stories or articles, but has gone that extra mile and actually shared their thoughts with me.

I will take this opportunity to say a massive thank you to all my readers who have ever left me a comment. If I don’t always reply, it is because I am a WP dimwit that hasn’t checked the Unapproved folder on my dashboard… trust me I value every comment and always try to reply to you!

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This post has been prompted by two recent events.

I have a lovely new friend with whom I have been enjoying many truly stimulating and thought-provoking conversations, about all sorts of things, but in particular, our shared interest in BDSM.

Inspired by some of our discussions, I tried my hand at a new angle in my erotic writing, by creating a story based on a relationship between a masochistic sub and her sadist Dom. I loved the challenge of trying to get the dynamics just right, trying to set the mood and recreate the feelings of each party involved in the scene. The level of physical brutality and the language I used in the story was a change of style for me and I found it incredibly liberating to step away from my usual patterns and stretch myself. I was beyond delighted when my friend, (who is much more au fait with the S side of S/M than I am), gave me a glowing thumbs up for accuracy and mood. The next day I was equally thrilled when another friend, this time a female masochist sub, said, “Fuck yes, Yes yes yes. I may or may not be playing with myself to that story rn…” Trust me, as a writer of erotica, THAT is the best review you can get!

However, not all my comments were 100% glowing! (And, for the record, let me say that I never expect to receive only positive feedback. In my opinion all feedback, positive, negative and everything in-between is valuable to me as a writer. There is always room to learn and improve.)

This morning I read a comment from a reader, MyLovingWife, who had been reading my new story “Sir and Little Girl… Knife Play“, perfectly happily until they encountered the word “slut”, which completely threw them and, in their own words, “it turned me off“. My reader also felt that the physical interaction in my story could be seen as “abusive”.

I replied by thanking them, sincerely, for their feedback and clarifying that I never condone abuse in any form and that, in the context of BDSM, the word “slut” is in fact a term of affection or praise even. We entered into an interesting discussion from there and, I’m pleased to say, I do believe we both left it feeling that we understood each other’s points of view much better than we did at the start.

This is another reason I love receiving comments; even ones that could be perceived as negative do not have to lead to confrontation or discord, and can in fact be the spark of an exchange of views and even the start of a new friendship. Personally, I didn’t perceive MyLovingWife’s comments as negative at all. Rather, I identified with their unease with words and descriptions that are foreign or offensive to them, having been there myself several times.

I thought about this encounter, my own ever-developing and altering attitudes towards sex and BDSM, and the conversations between my friend and I, and I felt that writing a piece about what BDSM is, what is means, (to me and to others), would be an interesting exercise, for me, and hopefully, for my readers!

I also expect I will receive comments from people who will have very different opinions and beliefs to mine, as well as from people who are much more well informed and knowledgeable about the world of BDSM than I am.

I welcome it all and expect to learn from anything you guys choose to share with me.


I have always been fascinated by everything to do with paraphilia. The diverse range of things us human beings can be attracted to or aroused by is, it seems, limitless! I have read about the subject… a lot!

Also, I have had a leaning towards BDSM for as long as I can remember having the feeling that I am a sexual being. For me, sexual arousal has alway been linked to power, vulnerability, dominance, submission and yeah… pain! It is simply how I am wired. I struggled with it, denied it, pushed it away for a long time.

I have to tell you, accepting myself as I am, and educating myself about my needs and desires, is perhaps the most liberating experience of my life. I no longer feel embarrassed, ashamed, odd or different.

I am not bad, dirty, (well, yeah I am, but you know what I mean!), disgusting, perverted or sick.

I have a sexual orientation as real and as valid as heterosexuality, homosexuality, bisexuality and all the other combinations and permutations you can derive from those!

FYI: If you are reading this, and you consider anything outside of heterosexuality to be wrong in any way, this is not the blog for you, my friend!

So, allow me, if you will, to clear up some common misconceptions about BDSM with a few very useful graphics.

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IMG_2989I hope it is clear from these excellent charts that BDSM is an enjoyable, reciprocal and, most importantly, consensual form of relationship between two adults who share complimentary needs.

I have found people in the BDSM world to be some of the most open, caring, nonjudgemental and friendly, welcoming people I have ever encountered. A true Dominant or submissive is highly respectful in their interactions with others and they are usually highly skilled communicators.

People outside the lifestyle struggle to understand the dynamics of a *D/s relationship and do often see it as a form of abuse. The language used in BDSM can be confusing for people outside it. Even I struggled with the word “slut” before I truly understood the way it is used in a BDSM context. To quote a female friend who is a sub, “being called a slut makes me feel like I’ve really achieved something!”

Other subs enjoy being called, “whore”, “bitch”, “little girl”, “little one”, “pet”, “slave”, the list goes on!

To put it simply… as long as the person being called the name is happy to be called it, even derives pleasure from it, surely that is all that matters?

A final point I very much want to make is this… It really, really isn’t all about sex!

That is perhaps the single biggest misconception about BDSM out there. People think that we live this way because it is all about dressing up, tying each other up, slapping, spanking and whipping each other, having all manner of kinky sex… and yes, we do!

But there is so much more to it than that.

Quoting my ever-so-elequant friend who described it as;

It’s meeting needs that cannot be meet in any other way. You’re open and vulnerable in a way you simply aren’t in any other relationship. This is something we need in our souls. What’s more intimate than filling that space in someone’s very core, or they in you? It’s the closest we can get to truly joining our hearts I believe. It’s trust, it’s communication, it’s an exchange of energy. Nothing else comes close in my experience.”

Now… that is definitely about more than wearing latex and handcuffs!

A BDSM relationship will be based on the most honest, intense, soul-baring communication you could possibly imagine. A Dom needs to understand his sub inside out in order to fulfil her needs, and his, without causing her, or him, physical, emotional, psychological or spiritual harm. A sub needs to understand and know her Dom fully, in order to be able to trust her wellbeing and safety to him and, in turn, offer him her greatest gift… her submission.

I have barely scratched the surface of BDSM, believe me!

If I have sparked your interest, there is a wealth of information out there, some true, some false, so be selective what you read. Trust me when I tell you that 50 Shades of Grey is definitely NOT to be considered a handbook!

If you have comments or questions, you know I will be delighted to read and reply to them. If you have more information, or can point me in the direction of more, please do so!

I will end by saying this…

Whatever it is that you like to do, whatever makes you happy, as long as it does no harm to anyone else, just do it, enjoy it and have fun!

Leave self judgement, shame and society’s ignorance and bigotry at the door.

Life is short people! Live it how you want to.

*Note: D/s can be male/female, female/male, male/male, female/female and everything in-between! I simply used Dom/sub in my personal context of male/female

**Many thanks to MyLovingWife and to my lovely friend for inspiring me today! 

Copyright, 2015, illicitthoughts.wordpress.com

All rights reserved.

 

Calling all readers and writers of erotic fiction!


Regular readers of KittyKat might be aware of the fact that I run two other blogs, where I publish my erotic fiction. If you haven’t yet discovered it, and would like to give it a whirl, please click illicitthoughts and MsTsecretgarden and explore my sexier, kinkier side!

I am always looking for feedback, so I am reblogging a research article I posted to both my other sites. If you have read mine, or another writer’s, erotica or, if you write it yourself, I would be so grateful if you would read my reblog and take a couple of minutes to click on my polls.

Thank you and happy reading and writing!


I was asked yesterday on twitter why I write erotica.

My answer was easy… it is enormous fun and, to be honest, it comes easier and more naturally to me than any other genre. Whatever that says about me… I will leave to my readers and, possibly my future shrink, to decide.

I have  been asked if I ever get off on other people’s writing… well, doh! Of course!

I have come across, (pardon the dreadful pun!), many excellent writers, and have certainly felt tingles whilst reading their stories.

If a person can write about sex in an arousing manner, avoiding cliché, whilst maintaining a balance between fantasy and credibility, it is, in my humble opinion, a sure indicator of whether the writer possesses true talent and skill.

It is no easy feat… all too often we fall foul of “quivering staffs” and, dare I quote it… *“puckered love cave”?!

And, fair is fair! I would never ask you a question I  am not prepared to answer myself so…

Yes, I do get aroused whilst writing my own fiction too! I figure if it is not making me squirm in my seat as I type,  it is not going to make you squirm either! So, I sit at my kitchen table, picturing scenes, sometimes miming out some actions to see if I am describing them accurately… yeah, my neighbours get an eyeful!

If you would do me the great favour of answering my polls I would be simply delighted and forever grateful. I promise it will not take more than 3 minutes of your time!

I am always striving to improve and always aim to please my readers.

I very much want to keep giving you all stories and material that interests and, yep, stimulates you!

No need to leave any personal details, just click on your answers, and if you can expand at all, please do so in my comments section. Feedback is always welcome and I hope it helps me improve and keep y’all happy!

Thanks guys and gals!

I do love y’all!

💋


*as if you didn’t already know! 50 Shades of Grey, EL James.

Copyright, 2015, k1kat.com

All rights  reserved.